Falling again 

You fell again. You smelled the bog’ s mud. You rolled in the mire. Your lips, thirsty for honey, touched the bitter taste of gall… 

Consider, however, dear friend, that maybe the Divine Goodness has placed you in this situation to teach you humility, to allow you deep reflection, to offer you a true change, not one of appearances, not one of momentary impulses – sudden changes are superficial, they are not long-lasting, and, failing them leaves an experience before you that devastates self-esteem, that is: the frustration of the promises you made to yourself.  

Your ideal has been tortured for a long time. Do not distress yourself, though. Remember that the Christ is aware of everything; that God, Infinite Love, knows the best paths for you; and that, often, when we feel most lost, is when the possibility of us being on the shortest route to redemption and happiness is the greatest. 

Yes, you fell. How about getting up now, with your whole heart, and be willing to not fall again? How about using the swoon of the fall to generate a turbo boost to rise to the Heights? The angels, be assured, do not condemn you for not being an angel. God, in the same way, will not demand from you what He-She knows is not possible for you yet.  

So, relax, and accept your humanity. God sees you with unalterable affection. There has been no change in His-Her concept of you or in the protection and providence that He-She offers you. There is no terrible punishment waiting for you at the next corner of destiny. Only those who stop, because of their falls, are condemning themselves to terrible consequences: those resulting from inertia before the windstorms of adversity. 

You have been through other falls, through other innumerous difficult experiences and you came out of them enriched and matured. Why fear now? Focus your energies on work. Do not waste time with trifles. Become one with God, serving your brothers and sisters, and everything will be solved, at the right time. 

Start a new pattern today. Start a new life. Say goodbye to old habits. Commit yourself, completely, to the effort of being happy, pledge yourself to your renovating ideal, and the rest, be assured: will come as a consequence.       

The imbalance that you surrendered to may be a messenger of a new level of progress of which you will have to face, in order to absorb chaos at a deeper level of order. 

Listen to your heart: deep down, you know that everything is alright. Forget the past and think about the future. “Restart” is the keyword for those who really want to accomplish something. Do not lose yourself in unproductive thoughts about what is gone. Focus your mind on what will come, on what you can do with your now. 

Forgive and accept yourself back into the home of your peace. Do not close the doors on you: allow yourself to be welcomed back, by your generous and peaceful heart, after the exhausting and painful journey through crisis and defeat. Do not give in the anguish of psychological self-flagellation, of self-punishment. Concentrate in doing more, in doing better, in building new worlds, new realities of happiness and peace, for yourself and your brothers and sisters. Everything will end well. Everything is already ending well.     

Benjamin Teixeira de Aguiar 

by the Spirit Eugênia-Aspásia 

August 25th, 2001.